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Driving in Cairo

I sent out this email about driving in Egypt:

Here is Jake's handy guide to communication in a car in Cairo:

Bip�� general "hello". Used when about to enter an intersection, or pass pedestrians
bip ... bip��"you haven't moved over enough"
Bep��"Oops, you're a little close there, might want to look around"
bep bep bep��"Okay, you're getting really close"
beep��general anouncment "i see you" or "I see that you see me" or "I'd like to pass please"
beep beep��usually when you are walking, and it is a taxi asking, "do you need a ride?"
BEEEEEP��"whatch out!" or "you are too close"
BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP��come on already, whats the holdup?
BEEEEP BEEEEEEEEEEEEP BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP��"@#&!, get out of the &*$@ way, we're all about to die!"

Practise these first, and then we can move on to integrating the headlight flash to modify the meanings in new and interesting ways.

And then, we'll get onto night driving, where the headlights go on very rarely at all. There is an instruction video for this section.

To which a high school buddy replied:

     > Subject: RE: Egypt
     > Date: Fri, 1 Oct 2004 17:14:42 +0930
     > From: "Matthew Dubsky"
     > To: "Jake Hawkes" 
     > 
     > 
     > As I recall, 'Mohommed Schumacher' our cab driver in Cairo gave me a few
     > rules on driving in Cairo.
     > 
     > 1. Drive in all the available space. The lines are purely there for
     > decoration, and foreigners.
     > 2. Never look the other driver in the eye, that way he knows you have
     > seen him.
     > 3. the most important thing on your car is your horn.
     > 4. Lights are optional. Most people in cairo believe that when you turn
     > it on it flattens the battery.
     > 5. only give way to Military vehicles.
     > 6. There are no rules.
     > 
     > Schumacher drove us out to Saqqhara and almost killed us. I have never
     > ever sat in a Hyundai excel and watched as an appearing lorry came
     > belting down on us, only to have schu whip back in and the truck hurtle
     > past my window. Think I shat myself that day.
     > 
     > 
     > Matthew Dubsky


One of the mosques surrounding the Khan el-Khalili	One of the mosques surrounding the Khan el-Khalili	Andrea, Lisa and Retaa in a BBQ resteraunt deep in the Khan. We covered the tables with food for ab...	Another bad traffic picture.	This was the only kid beggar that got any money from me. She was the cutest most depressing thing I...	Some typical downtown Heliopolis architecture.	Another downtown mosque.	Another downtown mosque.	Jake, Rach, List and Christy, with no flash.	Jake, Rach, List and Christy with a very bright flash. Rach and Christy were travelling the middle ...
The Mogama Building. Not usually banana shaped, but the image stiching program is a little weird so...	Reta was the first of us to be brave enough to touch these kittens. This was in the Khan. All over...	Of course, once she did it, we all joined in.